5 Tips to End Financial Fights

5 Tips to End Financial Fights

The way you handle finances is sure to change once you get married. Ideally, you have discussed this with your spouse before the wedding and are now working together to achieve your shared goals.

However, it is not uncommon for couples to have fights over finances, especially if you two are not financially compatible. You will need to work harder to compromise and take steps to avoid financial problems. Solve even the smallest issues as these eventually lead to bigger ones. Here are five tips to help you get started and end the money fights today.

1. Listen.

Sit down with your spouse and figure out what is not working and why. Does your spouse feel the budget is unreasonable? Was it not created following a team process? Talk openly and listen to your partner. Find out what his or her concerns are about the budget and find ways to adjust. You may decide to add more categories, have a personal independent allowance, and agree on how to deal with anyone asking you for money. Work together to make your budget work for you both.

2. Have consensual agreement for larger purchases.

Wait until both of you are okay with it. Until then, discuss any issues to arrive at a decision. Some helpful questions to ask include: Can you pay for the item in cash? Will purchasing it affect other financial goals? Do you just want to save more money? Explain your reasoning to each other and make sure to listen. There will be tons of large purchases in your life, like the education of your children and caring for your aging parents, so you need to work out a process in discussing these.

3. Have shared financial goals.

It can be incredibly frustrating when only one spouse thinks about the money. There are many future concerns that include both partners, like retirement and buying a house. The best thing to do is to set goals together. Talk about what you want to achieve and come up with solutions to problems that may arise along the way.

4. Communicate.

If your spouse is not on board with your money focus, explain why budgeting is important to you. Even if it is not a priority of your partner, you can help him or she understands why it matters to you. Explain the value you place into budgeting and what it means to have support. Then set goals that you can both agree on. The point here is to make it a discussion – not a nagging session!

5. Be accountable to each other.

Finding a good accountability system will help you budget together. Talk about how you spend your money and track it as a team. Work together to address issues and offer support to each other. You may want to use a software or app to make budgeting easier, switch to cash to limit spending, or have separate splurge money added into your categories. Attend to your finances as a team and you will lessen the fights and build more wealth.

Ian Schindler